1/17/16

A 35 year old memory....


It was a cold and snowy day 35 years ago today, January 17, 1981, I had a date. My first date since my divorce 2 years earlier. We worked together, but he was night shift on one side of the street and I was days on the other. A mutual friend thought we would be a good match. So she "introduced" us by simply telling each of us about the other and suggested that Allen call me. So he did on my lunch hour and we started talking. He had seen me one day when he was in the office and I had never met him though. But we hit it off on the phone. We talked every day for three weeks. And every Friday he would ask me out and I would come up with a lame excuse not to go because I was scared to date with twin 2 year olds at home.

I finally told him I just didn't think it was a good idea to date somebody I worked with and while I appreciated talking to him, I just didn't think dating was a good idea. He said he hated that I felt that way but he appreciated my honesty. 

That was a week before Christmas. On New Year's eve I was working the front desk when he came in to pic up his check. Before I even knew who he was, my heart melted the moment he walked in the door. When he told me who he was, I thought "I am an idiot. I should have said yes." 

A week later, I was still reeling from meeting him and broke the golden Mom rule of "Don't call boys." So I called him and told him I had thought it over and since he was nights on one side of the street and I was days on the other side, that I didn't guess it would hurt to date a co-worker since there were no policies against it. 

His response was, "Well, I thought that was a lame idea and I really liked you so I thought I would wait till after the holidays and call you again."

So we agreed to go out the next weekend. I woke up on the 17th, the day of our first date, to find snow on the ground. I lived up a hill and wasn't sure he would come after all. But he did. My best friend Becky and her sister Shelly came to my house and kept the twins so I could go out. 

We went out to eat and to see Urban Cowboy with John Travolta. We both came away saying how much we loved the song "Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places." We then went back to his house and had Pepsi and Ruffles as he taught me how to play backgammon. I got home around 11:30. 

He had been a perfect gentleman all night. He was 28 years old and I was 24. He opened doors for me. Walked on the outside of the sidewalk when we went to the movie. When I got home, he walked me to my door and kissed me goodnight on the front porch. We had plans for him to come over and spend the day with me and the twins the next day. I gave him one last kissed, walked in the house, shut the door and leaned up against it, smiling. Becky said "How did it go?" I will never forget my reply...."I'm in love. I'm going to marry that man someday." She laughed at me. 

About a month later on Valentine's Day, I found out he felt the same way. Two months and 10 days from the date of our first date, on March 27th, 1981, I married my soul mate, my best friends, the love of my life. And here I am stand 35 years later after that first date, loving him even more than I ever dreamed was possible. Feeling loved by him in all the multitude of ways he showed me that love. I miss him dearly. He has been gone exactly 2 months today. And even though I know he can't come back and I know he went way before I was ready to let him go, I will forever be thankful for the 35 wonderful years I had with him. Thirty-five years of a love that was forever faithful. He stood by me through thick and thin. His love never faltered. He made me feel like I was the most beautiful woman in the world and like I was his special princess to pamper and spoil.

So happy first date anniversary to my sweetheart. I know you are in a better place and you are no longer in pain, but oh what I wouldn't give to have you back for just 10 minutes today to tell you one more time how much I love you. 


He loved to sing George Strait songs to me. Here are the two favorites he loved to sing. I Cross my Heart was Our Song.